Another.

This one is different.

I met her in a little diner off of route 22. Don't remember the name. We were both sitting at the counter when she caught me referencing a meme. (The internet's been keeping me good company that He can't take away recently.) An hour later, the owner shooed us out so he could close up shop, and when I mentioned I didn't have a place to crash, she let me stay in her dorm room.

She goes to some tiny college up here in the mountains. I think it's called Juanita College or something... I don't know. I stayed over a few times, and being the hopeless romantic I am... Well... back to the main point.

I've been here for almost a week. That's not right. I was with Katie for a day and a half before He found her and... I still can't talk about it. But this girl, she's different. I have a hunch, but I think she's making an effort to keep it from me...

I'm going to keep prying until I can confirm that she's being followed too.

Sincerely,
Alexander

My Last Post.

Sorry, I know... I cut that off early. Before I head out again I figure I'll write another post to clarify. I just... When I recounted His appearance, I just couldn't go on. He is definitely toying with me. Of course he wouldn't kill me. He hasn't quite ruined the point of living for me yet. Maybe I sound brave saying that, but truth is I just don't like the thought of dying. I'm a coward.

After His unearthly desire to destroy the most beautiful things in this world had played out the somber scene, I didn't stay long. I checked to see if she was still alive, but to no avail. The top of the car was bashed in pretty bad, maybe two whole feet. Where a living, breathing, beautiful person sat smiling back at me only seconds ago, there now laid a haunting mess of red. The worst part was, her face was still entirely intact, and it stared back at me, eyes mocking me and jaw gaping. I couldn't help but hold her hand one last time before I heard the sirens and donned my hood, sprinting off for God knows where.

If this reaches her parents- and I don't believe I need to provide a name for that brutal and specific of a crime- then please believe me; I will never forgive myself, and you shouldn't either. I am doing my best to avenge your daughter, as well.

At one point in my life, I had it far too easy. I had a lot of what I wanted delivered to me. I got depressed, and wished in an odd sense to grow old and regretful. As if a life of regret was exactly what I deserved. I can't help but wonder if these emotions are what He uses to get His way in... Or if they make us more enjoyable prey. But I sure as Hell am regretting getting my wish now. I'd take it all back in a heartbeat.

For now, I am on a fast food joint's wifi, and I don't know where I'm heading next. I'm looking to test a theory, though... So I may have a specific destination in mind. No guarantees. I promise to start posting regularly again.

Sincerely,
Alexander

What am I doing.

I went to a concert with her, and then somehow this happened.

We sit together on the bench at 3am in the pitched black darkness, with only a few distant lights to guide the way to the safety of her black two-door chariot, and the last thing I want is to lie to her, but the last LAST thing I want to do is to tell her the absolute truth- what I have been hiding for her safety. No, our safety.

I mean, I could tell her I just broke up with another girl, and that if we went along, she would only crush someone she has never met. Then she would turn me down.

Or I could inform her of my metaphysical stalker, and... well... She could lock me out of the car and drive away from my madman ass.

So I don't tell her, simply keep quiet.

It is as if an omnipotent being is hovering over my shoulder, whispering in my ear 'You can't do this. You know it won't work. You know it's wrong. I will smite you for an imperfect result.' "I hate being shy" tumbles loosely out.

"Well, sometimes, you just have to act."

"But what if it hurts someone else?" I question, longing to take her advice.

"You have to do what's right for you"

"But what if it's not right... What if..." I stumble, going nowhere with my words.

"You just have to do the best you can. You can't see the future. Just do what you think is right." This causes me to fall silent, as I know I can't argue this logic. I know no amount of foresight can save me. I end up putting my head on her shoulder, the omnipotent being still pestering me.

"You're a really ambiguous person" she states with a smile, after I shrugged off (and poorly, I might add) her question, which, for God's sake, could have been ANYTHING but 'What's on your mind?'

The only appropriate response? A grin and a shrug. I changed the subject.

"Are you still afraid of THE MURDERERS?!" It's sort of an inside joke, I guess. Something we share a lot of. "This place looks pretty murder-ish." If only she knew. My head is saying 'NO NO NO NO NO NO GET OUT' but my heart can't help but play me as the hopeless romantic.

As if sharing brains, we look behind us, playfully wide-eyed, and she takes off into the grass. I can't tell if she's actually scared of possible murderers, or she's just pretending (something I'm fond of) but it doesn't matter. She is damn cute. "HEY WAIT! Where are you going?" I follow, simply happy to be in her presence.

We meet in the middle of the grass, and I remember her advice. Not two minutes later, we are playing staring games, and not long after that, lips meet.

If you've ever kissed someone on a date before, you know that everything else in your mind pretty much stops, and everything slips away. It almost feels like if you open your eyes during the kiss, you and her would be standing on some small island in space, floating into nothing.

So let me tell you, friend, what a shock it is to have that feeling shattered. It came to me like a cicada song, loud and obnoxious. It must have built up in the trance of that gesture of love, at first an impercipient hum, now a cacophony in my head. Alarm bells in my head ring as He approaches closer and closer. Though startling, I keep my composure and finish the kiss. I fake a shiver, and we get back in the car and take off with the heat on.

I can't rope her into this... but at the same time, I can't help it. What am I supposed to tell her? "Sorry, I have to skip town right now."? We drive around for a bathroom break, and when we get back in the car, it sputters as the key turned. She tries maybe 10 times with no luck, and I get anxious. He would show his face soon. So when the engine finally turned, we drove straight "home".

We turn onto "my street" (where I told her I lived. No one wants to date a hobo.) and she lets me out in front of "my house" (a place I had found unlocked, by TOTALLY inconspicuous trial and error.) and I give her a kiss good night, leaning in through the open door.

I open my eyes and shit goes to Hell so fast, words cannot express it. Before I even reach to close the door, His tentacles appear in a flurry behind her, two breaking their way in through the windows. The first snaps the driver side seat belt like a length of twine, and the second wraps around her, pulling her out through the window.

Now, I've heard that when he touches you, the pain is unimaginable. But he picks her up effortlessly, scraping her sides on the broken glass of the windshield as she goes through the broken mess, then slams her against the top of the car over and over before throwing her bloody body into the middle of the street and disappearing. That kind of pain, I don't think I could even comprehend.

It could have been me. Why not?

I wanted it to be me.

Sincerely,
Alexander

Not Prepared Enough.

I'm slipping carelessly. Making really dumb decisions.

I should have left by now.
I should be far away. But I'm not.
I also probably shouldn't be reading H.P. Lovecraft. God knows it's not making this any easier.

Anyway, I'm really fucked. I have an opportunity to escape though. My dad and I are going on a trip to Sweden (Sverige!) for my birthday/graduation. He paid for a round trip, but half of that money might as well go towards me not going to Hell.

In the meantime, I've been hopping from friend to friend, sleeping on couches. Since I take the COTA bus and I'm a pretty independent kid, my mom isn't asking any questions I can't at least somewhat rationalize away. It's better than endangering her though.

A bit off topic time: I was around the interblags tonight and found a bit of info that led me to a certain website for some religious group or something. The info's poster was looking to fight them in some way. The info itself contained an admin username and 'password'. I wouldn't have tried them if someone hadn't confirmed that the password was actually a SQL injection (forgive my geekspeak here.) But I was too curious to see if the code actually worked.

...too bad it did. [admin / ' OR 'x'=x'] got me right in. Before the page even finished loading I realized what I'd done, and closed it. I also cleared my data, although I'm not sure if that actually would help if the sysadmin recorded my IP. I didn't do anything, but they could still prosecute me I suppose.

And yes, I am home, not at a friend's, so it is my connection they'd be tracing.

Probably nothing to worry about, buuuuut... I don't need two enemies against me, now. It just makes me nervous.

Tired. Post more later.

Sincerely,
Alexander.

What The Hell Is Wrong With Me?

Yesterday, I decided to take a walk in the woods.

I could end my post now, as you probably know where it's going.

Anyway, I missed the bus down the main street and had to take a diffcerent bus, which lets off on the other side of the woods from my house.

Io know, I know. Dumb move.

But I just miss the woods so much. The house I was born in had a ravine behind it. At the bottom was a creemk. That creek runs all the way through town, and the woods that surround it were where I spent a good portion of my childhood. In that moment when I passed the trees, I just felt a longing for my childhood that I haven't felt for years. I missed the trees and the sound of the bierds chirping.

Especially blue jays. I miss blue jays.

I suppose I went crazy for just a second. But I couldn't tresist. I crossed all 5 lanes of traffic to where the path began near underpass of the bridge, heading north into the trees beside the creek- the same one I grew up on. The poath walked next to the water, and I considered going down to listen to the creek. I was only walking for about 30 seconds into the trees before things got bad.

First Iu noticed that feeling of being surrounded- Like standing in the middle of a crowd. Except I was all alone. I knew I had made a terrible mistake just then. I quickened my pace, knowing I could get out to the park just ahead if I hoofed it. Then... It's a bit blurry, but I remember things getting cloudy and losing my way. Then after what could have been 5 minutes or asn hour, I realized this- Kind of like waking up when you realize you're asleep.

I took one step towards the park (which wasn't that far away, surprisingly) before the trees all seemed to close in on me. And that's when He appeared.

The only option was back the direction I came. Which wasn't really an option either, considering how He travels. (Or at least how it seems He travels.) Nevertheless, I turned 180 degrees and stumbled away before regaining my footing, making a break for the bridge. I soon reached the underpass at my breakneck speed and made my way up to the sidewalk overlooking the creek. Out of the danger of the trees, I looked back in surprise.

He was just standing there, tall and calmly menacing, almost nonchalantly. Then, He showed his tentacles. After I broke my momentary gaze, I sprinted towards home, the moving image of those black arms of Death replaying in my mind over and over again.

Arriving at my front door huffing and puffing, I just hoped he wasn't waiting for me inside, or in the backyard or the garage or the shed or next door or anywhere any more because I just couldn't take it. I can't.

But I suppose it's better than the alternative- Whatever that is, exactly.

Stay safe.

Sincerely,
Alexander.

Preparation.

Do you know that feeling right before you wake up, when it seems like the whole world is going to end? I had a thought. Maybe in each of our dreams there is a world we exist in, if only for 4 to 5 minutes in terms of this world's time. But perhaps we're just the dream of someone else in a world encapsulating ours. And maybe they're part of another world's dream too. When you think about it like that, time really is forever. There doesn't necessarily have to be a top level; If you go down far enough (If you live an entire world in 4-5 minutes you'd miss the dreams, right?) maybe you'd come out the top again. Maybe even come back to your own world. Except we're stuck here.

Anyway, I can get a bit philosophical sometimes. See, some people have religion (See Hosptaller's The Hospital), some have alcohol (See about 60%-70% of the Slender Man blogs out there) and I have logic. Logic and music. Both calm me down and give me an escape. When I just don't want to think about Him (His visits have increased to the point where that featureless face sticks in my mind like glue when I close my eyes.) I ask my good friends Matt & Kim for help, or maybe that old magnificent bastard Tchaikovsky if I'm in the mood. When my thoughts start to drift, I let them. My brain goes some interesting places, which I can deliberate on, if my invisible audience is interested.

Between the music and the thinking, I've been reading up on my brothers in transit. The runners have a lot to say. And I mean A DAMN LOT. Seriously. There's so much out there about the damn villain you'd think someone would have found out something useful about him. But not so. Maybe if someone will figure out something, they're still reading through the metric fuckton of stories available. There are compilations, like COMPILETRUTH on YouTube, but they only serve to prove to the newcomer that we're not crazy.

Well, maybe.

Are we crazy?

I feel like if I keep looking, I'll find something helpful. Something to beat Him, maybe. I want to fight. The best way I can.

Knowledge is power, children.

I'll be on the run soon. Graduation is May 31st.

Sincerely,
Alexander.

No Choice.

I've done a lot of thinking these past few days. There's only one thing to do now. Run. It's what you should do too, if you read the last post. If you're already doomed, there's only one option: Escape. He can always find you. And where he can find you, the proxies can find you too. Maybe I'm getting ahead of myself.

I don't know how smart he is, Mr. no-face. Most call him "The Slender Man". A fitting name, I suppose. No one really knows who he is. Probably because mostly everyone who sees him with their own eyes disappears sooner or later. Those who live the longest are the runners. They are always moving. It doesn't matter where you go. He can still find you. It's just a matter of how many times you can escape his grasp.

From what others are saying, he isn't very smart though. There are a list of rules a runner named M has put out. I think his blog is called the tutorial. It's definitely worth checking out. I know I'll be using it. Since school is almost over, I'll risk staying the extra few weeks... It's not safe, but I'll be able to escape easier once classes are over, since I will be in contact with fewer people. That's the worst part I think - Having to leave everything behind. I wish there were another way. There isn't.

Updating will be difficult from the road. I will bring my laptop with me, but finding internet access and an open power outlet will probably be difficult. Wish me luck...

Sincerely,
Alexander